"It"

"It" hit me today, I do not know what "it" was but "it" hit me and I was sad. I think "it" could have been exhaustion. Akiva my beautiful baby boy spoiled me. When he was six weeks old he started to sleep through the night and while we were on vacation he stopped. He now wakes up at about one am to eat and again between four and five. I am tired. I am so tired that I fall asleep while the baby is nursing and he winds up sleeping right next to me all night nursing when ever he wants to. It has to end because this is a bad habit I am not willing to continue. It is not safe and it is not teaching him how to sleep on his own. We all know how I feel about sleep! I am going to have to enlist the help of my husband and get him to help me get Akiva back to his own bed in the middle of the night, then we can start to work on getting him to sleep through the night again.
"It" could also be the lack of sleep I got over the weekend because the big girls decided to have a slumber party on Saturday night and went to sleep after midnight. They were taking their babies to the doctor, singing songs, reading books and driving their cars. What they were not doing was sleeping which meant that we were not sleeping either. They are actually upstairs not sleeping now. Matt put them up two hours ago and they are too busy building a farm and taking their babies to the potty to sleep.
"It" could have been the dime. I was really worried about what we were going to do if that dime did not come out.
"It" could have been Jordan and her never ending illness. Jordan is a tough kid and when she is sick or does not feel good she is even tougher. Everything was making her cry. I should say everything made her scream and yell and fall to pieces. Maybe now that she has had antibiotics in her system for six days she will calm down and be the child I know and love.
"It" is making me crawl into bed before eleven tonight and not touch the pile of clean clothes that need to be folded and put away.